My Last Breath
by Black Moon White Sun
Summary: [Oneshot]Peter is just about to die when he remembers Narnia and what kind of relationship he had with Susan. [From Peter's PoV. PeterSusan with slight SusanCasian.]


**Author's Note: Another one-shot? I've written three in the last two weeks. So here's this one. It's from Peter's point of view of his relationship with Susan. It took me about an hour and a half on this so it may be a bit crappish. Constructive critism. If you don't like incest, DON'T READ!**

_Story Title inspired by Evanescence's "My Last Breath"

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I knew I was going to die. I knew it the moment the train left the tracks that it was time. I closed my eyes not wanting to see the train hit me or some other notion. But when they closed, I thought of _her_.

_Hold on to me love_

_You know I can't stay long_

_All I wanted to say was I love you and I'm not afraid_

_Can you hear me? _

_Can you feel me in your arms?_

She had invaded my thoughts since I became a King of Narnia. I knew it was wrong, but somehow it felt so right. I remembered how when the crown was placed on my head, I had glanced at her. I found something charming about her. She was the image of innocence and womanhood.

I was in love with Susan.

At the age of thirteen, the time I had been crowned, I somehow had fallen in love with the young eleven-year-old. I admired the way her raven-black locks fell on her porcelain cheeks and how she raised a fair hand to push them back. Susan was my protector, my guidance, the only one I could turn to for help, seeing as Edmund and Lucy were too young at the ages of nine and eight. She would offer a kind word, one that suited her title so well: _Queen Susan the Gentle_.

Five years passed, and I had reached the mature age of eighteen. My little sister became a voluptuous woman of sixteen. Susan had become sought-after by hundreds of men. I grew jealous as some of them were even allowed to kiss her lips, something I had hoped to do. I remembered telling myself that I had to tell her how I felt, or a good-for-nothing would come and take her away.

And then it happened.

I was standing on the balcony, the sounds of the annual Christmas Ball (or the 'Jingle Ball', as Lucy vivaciously put it) going on behind me. I felt someone touch my shoulder. I turned and saw none other than my raven-haired sister. Her hair was elegantly let down and she was stylishly dressed in deep azure silk-the color I thought she looked best in.

"What are you doing here, Peter?" she asked in her sweet voice. Behind the tone, I found something enticing, something compelling, that without so much as a thought, I pressed my lips against hers. I was shocked to find her deepening the kiss. I hesistantly licked her lips, for even though I wanted this so badly, I still had morals. She had parted her lips by now and my tongue explored her mouth. We broke apart, gasping for air. She smiles at me, a happy twinkle in her eyes.

"I love you too, Peter," she says, wrapping her arms around me.

And just with those five words, a paradise seemed to erupt before me.

_Holding my last breath_

_Safe inside myself_

_Are all my thoughts of you_

_Sweet raptured light, it ends here tonight_

Nine years pass this time. By now, I'm a happily married man of twenty-eight. My sister, now my wife, holds our youngest child, three-year-old Adelina, in her arms. We both turn as the sound of hooves reached our ears. A moment later, Mr. Tumnus appeared. He looks very excited for some reason.

"Your Majesties," he said, addressing the three of us (for even though Adelina was young, she _was _a princess.) "The White Stag has been seen in the Western Woods." I grew excited. The White Stag was legend. It was said to appear once every century to grant its capturer's wishes. Neither I nor my siblings were going to miss of getting our wishes granted.

"Have you told Edmund and Lucy?" Susan asked in equal fervor.

"He has," said our brother's voice from the door. I saw that he was already wearing his riding clothes. Susan and I were already changed since we had gone riding earlier today.

"Where are you all going?" asked a small voice. I turned to see my oldest child, seven-year-old Tatiana. She was looking from his uncle to me.

"You have to stay here, dear," I said, knowing that she would do no such thing. Instantly, she started to pout.

"I want to go! Please, Daddy!" she begged, tugging on my shirt sleeve. I finally realized why parents shouldn't spoil their children.

"No, dear, you have to stay here with Mr. Tumnus. You can play with Adelina," Susan said while handing her her sibling. Tatiana looked at the toddler. She seemed to be disgusted.

"No!" she screamed and went out the room. I sighed, rubbing my face with my hands. I felt my wife's comforting hand on my shoulder.

"She'll get over it," she said calmly. Yet, I never knew if she _did_ get over it. For an hour later, I landed in a room that was absolutely bare except for a wardrobe. I looked over towards Susan. She was eleven again. I felt dazed at the time. I looked like a boy of thirteen years, but I had the experience of a man of twenty-eight.

"Are we ever going back?" Lucy asked a moment later. I risked a glance at Susan. Then, I turned to my youngest sister.

"I sure hope we do."

_I'll miss the winter_

_A world of fragile things_

_Look for me in the white forest_

_Hiding in a hollow tree_

_(Come find me)_

We did go back a year later. Except more than a thousand years had gone by. I wondered what had ever happened to my children. I felt guilty thinking that they were left without parents.

Before I knew where time had gone, I was fighting to rescue my land. My natural reflexes helped to distract a man from killing Caspian. I was going to regret that later. A few days later, we're told that we are never to go back to Narnia. At least, Susan and I aren't.

I feel hollow inside. But the hollowness inside was replaced by fury as I see Caspian and Susan surreptitiously giving each other a quick kiss on the lips. I was ready to drive a sword through him but I held back. At least she wouldn't see him again.

Somehow, eight years later, between all the nylons, lipsticks and parties, my once prized wife becomes shallow. She snaps at any mention of Narnia. Yet, I still love her.

"Su, don't you remember Adelina or Tatiana?" I asked desperately one day. "They were our _children_." She turns around from the mirror that she's studying herself in to fix me with an imperious look.

"You're not talking about that stupid game again, are you?" she asked incredulously.

"It _did_ happen," I cried beseechly. "Why can't you remember?"

"Because it never happened," she said firmly. She picks up her purse and leaves the house. Literally.

So here I am, bent in an abnormal way and gasping for breath. Different colors swim in my eyes, making me feel like I'm blind. Then a voice speaks.

"Peter!" My sight slid into focus just then and I saw Susan staring back at me, her azure eyes flooding with tears, tears that fall on my face. I forced my hand to touch her cheek. It took about half of my already consumed energy to do so.

"I'm sorry, Peter," she sobbed. I felt her trembling. I lightly stroked her cheek. She seemed to be slight comforted by this.

"I love you," I said in a short breath. My last breath. I felt a tear fall on my cheek just as I slid slowly into death.

_I know you hear me_

_I can taste it in your tears_

I feel the softness of grass on my hands. I found that strange since I was just lying on a concrete floor. I sit up and rub my eyes. A good two hundred feet away, Edmund was doing the same thing.

"Are you alright?" he asked. I nodded though I wasn't entirely sure.

"Edmund! Peter!" Lucy's voice called out. A moment later, she was in view. I noticed that she was wearing a Narnian dress. A thrill of hope went inside me. We were back! I was deep in my thoughts when I felt someone nudge me. I looked up to see Professor Kirke and his friend, Polly Plummer. I was in shock. _So they had been on the train too? _

The few seconds in silence suddenly turn into minutes of loud noise. From somewhere, we could here the sounds of battle. And then, they were gone. Three people appeared-my cousin, Eustace, Eustace's friend, Jill Pole, and a young man who looked a bit like Caspian.

A roar reached our ears and I knew that before I even turned around, it was _Him_. I had my arms around the Great Lion as did the others. Lucy was crying tears of joy.

"Rise, King Peter," the deep voice rumbled. I obediently did so. He gestured with his head towards a door. A large group of people stood there. About half of them entered where they were while the other half stayed where they were. A cry reached my ears.

"Daddy!" I turned and saw my four children, all looking the same age as when I left them. I had little Adelina in my arms while the four-year-old twins-Mark and Matthew-each grabbed a leg of mine. Tatiana was the last to come. She looked up at me.

"I'm sorry for yelling at you," she said in an apologetic tone. I slightly kissed her on the cheeks. She looked so much like Susan.

"Dad, where's Mum?" Mark asked. I felt a stab of pain. I had to them that they might not see their mother for a long time.

_Closing your eyes to disappear_

_You pray your dreams will leave you here_

_But still you wake and know the truth_

_No one's there_

"Mama!" Adelina cried.

"Yes dear, Mark asked about Mum," I said in an absent-minded tone. But the little girl shook her head. She pointed at something with her hand.

"Mama!" she screamed again. I nearly dropped her when I saw Susan standing there. Her long black hair was let down and she wore deep azure silk. She looked exactly like when I had first kissed her.

Putting down Adelina, I rushed over to her. We embraced each other, my hands on her waist, hers on my shoulders.

"How long has it been?" I asked.

"Too long," she answered and she gently brushed my lips with hers. Our children came and hugged us tightly.

Somehow my last breath had given me even more life.

_Holding my last breath_

_Safe inside myself_

_Are all my thoughts of you_

_Sweet raptured light, it ends here tonight_


End file.
